Psalm 86 + Nanny's services + Day 5

 I was able to spend about 5 hours with my bestie from 6th grade and it felt so good.  Normally we have many things to get to so we have about 2 hours every 6 months to catch up.  We know each other's family so well so to catch up on her parents and siblings and their lives and to fill her in on my brothers and my parents, was really refreshing and hard at the same time.  We share the good, hilarious, and the grief.  Thats really what it is - you grieve what you thought was there or what was lost or has been changed.  

Psalm 86 is helping me and I highly recommend reading it, all 17 verses are so good, but I highlighted verse 5, "O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help."  As I find myself needing a lot of help these days, and one is preparing for my grandmothers' burial.  Preparing for this closure, preparing for family who may come that could cause division, preparing for my response, and needing God to just put His hand in all of it.  I cannot control others, nor do I want to.  I do not have the power to understand why other people do the hurtful things they do, and I don't want to.  I do know who created all, loves all, justifies all, and who calls and equips those who call upon the Lord.  

We wrapped up the day with 4 out of 5 of us having a family night at Wahooz.  We haven't been in years altogether and it was a lot of fun to play bumper boats, drive go Karts, play miniature golf, walk tightropes, and get a treat.  During our family time I reflect on mine quite a bit.  What will my kids do, will they live close together?  Will they vacation together?  Will they raise kids close together?  Will they travel? Will they spend 5 hours one day with a childhood best friend and go over all the things?  Will they live far apart but make the effort to call each other like my brothers and I do?  Please, Lord, let them hang on to one another.  Knit them close and let them love their differences.  Help them marry spouses that all get along.  I haven't always been able to pray these prayers without worry or spiraling, but last night I could and I'm thankful for that.  Laughing with them while simultaneously praying to God over their lives.  That is a full-time job, and I am thankful to have it.